Regret is one of the biggest and most common emotions a person can experience after losing someone. On top of the pain of the actual loss, the feelings of regret come rushing through, making even the strongest of us ask: 

• What else could I have done? 
• Why didn’t I do more? 
• Why didn’t I treat them better? 
• Why didn’t I say what I needed to say?

In one of the more known Gospel stories, Martha’s regret after the loss of her brother is evident: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

Yet, it did not end in regret. Martha was able to move on to hope and gratitude. “I know he will rise, in the resurrection on the last day.” In other words, this is not the end; the separation is only temporary and there is eternal life. 

Hence in the goodbyes we have experienced in life, three things we remember:

1. First, trusting God’s mysterious, yet perfect, plan. God’s ways are different from our ways. God’s time is different from our time. There are many things in life that we are not in control. In the end, God’s plan will always prevail. 
2. Second, do what needs to be done. There are many things that should be done. There are many things that should have been said like, “I love you”, “I am sorry”, and “Thank you for everything.” Don’t waste time. Do it when you have to. You cannot predict life.
3. Lastly, nothing beats Kindness. People treat us differently. However, whether we are treated well or not, we cannot regret being kind. It is better that one forgives instead of being forgiven.

We thank God for all our loved ones who passed away. We pray for their eternal peace and rest. We too, pray for all our relationships. They are present in our lives for a reason and purpose. May we live a life of less regret. That will happen if you love to the fullest. Love God by trusting his mysterious ways; love others by being kind; love yourself by doing and saying what has to be done.